here comes the sun

When New York weather treating us nicely, I get scared. Because I know winter will coming back harder. But it's impossible not to enjoy this adorable sunshine. In this weather, I can walk 10,000 blocks if you ask me to. (New Balance shoes needed)

It can be too heavy for this present day, but I had to post this...



I can clearly imagine the reaction of people for this, most people raise their eyebrows and some may not be able to watch til the end. It is shocking visually, and I was speechless. I don't know how can I say this, it's disgusting, powerful, new, reckless, angry, dark, and sad. But that' what it is, I guess. Youth... I have eternal attraction for the kids. (not meaning sexually of course) It's almost the vomit,that you forced to throw it from the mouth (and they like to vomit). And most importantly, I love their music. I had not have this kind of crush for a long time. I like the strong power that they don't care if they die, they don't care if someone got hurts, and just stay high for nothing. Odd Future is certainly odd but future, like it or hate it, as the name says. I would love to watch 10 years from now, what they will make. Hope they will not die by then. I really hope so.

Writing is what I used to really enjoy. It's the symbol of freedom and my creativity, even in a little thing such as how I pick the vocabulary, how the sentence order should go, and how I put it all together. I feel quite uncomfortable if sentence is unintentionally smooth or un-smooth. Then, when I started writing for getting by, it's not as fun as before any more. I think I am in a slump right now. This is such a normal thing, I know, that comes to everyone who choose to eat a bread by doing something you like. Musician, artist, anything who caught up into. Mine is not that serious, because I'm still not sure that writer should be a main focus in my career, but my frustration of unskilled English and restricted freedom of speech is killing me right now. and it's sad and heartbreaking that I can't love the thing in a way that I used to anymore. Honestly I cried in the pantry. Wiped my tears with my jersey top. I know I can be a very dramatic person, sometime take things too seriously. And I know I'm gonna forget this stress by the end of the night. I am just writing for my healing process because that's what I do anyway.I hope I can find clear borderline for my love and my job soon and be emotionless when I write for paychecks.

私は消費者です

ファッションにかかわる仕事をしているけど、私の目線はいつも消費者だと思う。買い物が単純に大好きで、そこにプロとしての分析や思考はなく、ただものを買いにお店をおとずれるのが好きだ。ある業界に長く居ると、そこで目が肥え経験を培うので、純粋な目線で自分のフィールドを見るのは難しくなる。音楽でもアートでもファッションでもそうだけど。私は基本的にアマチュアなので、ビジネスマンとしてとても中途半端で、普通に欲しいものを手に入れたいだけだから、「こういうものを作ったら売れるかも」とか、戦略的な考えにとてもうといので、消費者サイドだ。

だから、消費者の意見として、お店はとても大切だと思う。中学生のとき、ファッションに興味を持ち始めて、自分で住所を調べて行ったお店やそこに置いてあるものに感動したことや、店員さんの服をたたむ姿、初めて憧れのお店で買い物したとき紙袋やステッカーを大切にとっておいたこと、人はそういう気持ちを忘れない。全部記憶として残っている。お店は、すべての場所がひとつの大きなプレゼンテーションだ。だから、そこの場所が特別であると感じさせることがいいお店のあり方だと思う。

感動しなくなると、表現できなくなる。プロであるということは、そういう危険性もある。もちろんそれができない人はもともとプロではない。だから私はものを提供する場所でも、買い物のお客さんとしての気持ちをずっとずっと忘れずにいたい。となんとなく今日思った。